Why Searching for a Soul Mate is Damning to Love and Other Thoughts on Marriage Counseling
Why Searching for a Soul Mate is Damning to Love
“Love isn’t something natural. Rather it requires discipline, concentration, patience, faith, and the overcoming of narcissism. It isn’t a feeling, it is a practice.”
― Erich Fromm, The Art of Loving
Soul mates, the stuff of fantasies, dreams come true, love at first sight and also quite likely among the reasons you may find...
Learn MoreWounded Warrior, How to Survive a Loss of Love, Divorce Counseling and Breaking Up
Wounded warrior, How to Survive a Loss of Love…
The termination phase of love is a magnificent hurtle or sticking point for many of the lovers out there. Even if all seems hopeless right now, I want anyone wounded in love to recognize that there is abundant likelihood that your heart, mind, and spirit will make a full recovery. This does however require one to make use of some specific...
Learn MoreWarm and Well This Winter, Cooling Cabin Fever, A Psychotherapists Musings
It’s the time of the year for chills up and down the back, and not the kind that are associated with pleasure unless of course you are polar bear, seal pup, or avid skier! All of us here in the blustery northern hemisphere are struggling to maintain some semblance of energy and optimism yet we may find ourselves faltering with the realities of cabin fevers’ stillness upon us. In fact,...
Learn MoreRelationships, to have, hold or do not resuscitate? Marriage Counseling and Thoughts
The abundant contentment which our long term relationships provide is for many the ultimate hallmark of a life well-lived. Our human bonds sustain our happiness filling our celebrations with glee and making life burdens a bit easier to manage. Romantic relationships exert tremendous effects upon our long term happiness and even health. According to The National Institute of Mental Health,...
Learn MoreGood bye 2013, A New Year and What Else
“A New Year, A New You!” and many other such positive affirmations are floating about the cool air, sentiments which promote longed for change during this momentous time of the year. This is indeed a very appropriate time for consideration and setting action to goals with no task being too great or too small for one’s devotion! Following are some tips and suggestions which I have compiled...
Learn MoreThank You Hollywood
Thank you Hollywood
This essay, is an offering of gratitude to Hollywood’s fascination with therapy. When one takes a moment to reflect upon the big screen or television portrayals of psychotherapy you may be quick to realize that this kind of therapy is often found under the context of an ultra-masculine male client reaching out for counseling services. From cinema to sitcom, we all know...
Learn MoreYour Inner Voice, A Counselors Thoughts on Thoughts
Your inner voice, or more accurately, inner voices each of them tugging to be the declarer of your thought and action. Their presence is perfectly normal as they are the culmination of your past, present, and anticipated future experiences melded into your very little internal advisors. At their best, these voices are a valuable hot bed of wisdom! They are the voices that guide one towards the...
Learn MoreThe Sun & Your Mood, SUNGAZING
What if your eyes, your skin and your brain are very much like tiny solar panels connected to your brain? In some capacities they are! Our skin is the largest human organ and it is responsive on many levels to it’s surroundings and stimuli such as the sun. Most any person who lives in the Northern Hemisphere can acknowledge the effect that the seasons have on human cognition, human...
Learn MoreThe Art of Compassion
When talking with a friend recently the discussion turned to compassion, her gaze drew down and her feet shifted bashfully. After a moment of silence she admitted that she had little to know idea what the full meaning of this abstract concept is, and without even knowing she did not believe that it could offer any relevance to her practical life. Yet the truth is that for many of us who may...
Learn MoreBreathe, Tips from Psychotherapy on Relaxation
Everyone does it. So if you don’t mind my asking, when was the last time that you really did it? When was the last time you allowed it to propel you to the heights of Nirvana only to have it gently slide you back down into limp flesh, relaxed? I bet many of you didn’t even know that it could be so good, like sweet cream on a warm summer’s evening. After all, this very act sustains the life...
Learn MoreTalking The Talk; Communicating in Love
The pattern of mounting resentment is sometimes evidenced in romantic love. As a psychotherapist offering marriage counseling I see couples approaching the proverbial office with a mile high and well-worn list of “crimes,” the accumulated wrongs etched in the heart and mind perpetrated by the accused, their wife/husband/girlfriend/ boyfriend/partner. The end result is two confused, hurt, and...
Learn MoreForgiveness, Letting Go like Leaves of Fall, Thoughts from Psychotherapy
There is great wisdom in the seasons, the rhythms of the earth. I admire the leaves, those curious objects transitioning in brilliant metamorphosis. They motion from soft and green to reds, orange, and rust while becoming dry and brittle, forming a carpet upon the earth in their final descent. Yes, the earth has many lessons for us; mere mortals. In spring she takes in, blossoming and growing...
Learn MoreA World of Wellness and Psychotherapy
Wellness seems to have become one of those kitschy buzzwords, ever floating about, an aspiration, a lofty goal, just another on the list as “something for those other people.” As provocative or anxiety inducing as the term may be for you, it does comprise some ambitious and noteworthy components for the average person struggling to make ends meet while juggling a 9-5 and a house full of other...
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Reiki, Raising Vibrations, Energy Cleanse!
Reiki is an ancient energy and healing technique. Imagine the setting as your Reiki master, attunes to you, tuning in on the subtly flowing outpour of your qui, slowly places her hands above key chakra points on your physical body. The result is the clearing of energy blockages, using a philosophy similarly to that which allows acupuncturists to heal the physical body. The Reiki master works...
Learn MoreHELP~ IN LOVE AND UNDER ATTACK, Domestic Violence Resource! Marriage Counseling
Today’s article is devoted to a serious issue, domestic violence. With more and more abused partners seeking refuge within shelters and therapy offices, one would imagine that there would exist a cultural and personal awareness of abuse that could protect survivors before violence reaches extremes. However, the lines that exist when violence and abuse pervade the sanctum of a relationship are...
Learn MoreREVIVING LOVE IN THE STEEL CITY, Marriage Counseling and Beyond #ReviveYourLove
You love your wife, husband, boyfriend, live in lover, you have remained together “insert number of years.” In fact you are so stricken with these pangs of warm and gooey feelings that you want to put in the extra effort that love sometimes requires of us to enhance our relationship bonds. Or, another possible consideration is that your relationship is in a slump and if this is the case you...
Learn MoreSomething about Nothing, The Importance of Relaxation
Something about Nothing
The heated summer air is whirring beyond and within your skin, feet pounding upon the city sidewalks in an ever hurried procession. Preparation for yet another marathon, sweat beads forming and sliding, perspiring in cylindrical icicles down your front, back, and every inch of in between, an urgent reminder to go, go, go, harder, faster, more.
12 hour work days, 52...
Learn MoreFREEDOM FOR THE FEMALE
The 60’s may be an era far behind us but women all over the world may want to reconsider why it is still a good idea to burn those bras! More and more research is indicating that underwires and demi cups could be doing more damage than good for the shape and health of the breast. Furthermore I would personally encourage women to consider exactly why is it considered a faux pas to allow their...
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