6 Stages of Grief? What is Grief Anxiety?

Have you ever found yourself questioning if your grieving process is “wrong” because it doesn’t align with the commonly known five stages of grief coined by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance? If so, you may find some new insight from Claire Bidwell Smith, LCPC. Bidwell Smith sheds light on her addition to the 5 stages of grief, what she terms the sixth stage of grief—grief anxiety. 

In her groundbreaking book, “Anxiety: The Missing Stage of Grief: A Revolutionary Approach to Understanding and Healing the Impact of Loss,” Bidwell Smith unveils an addition to the five stages of grief—grief anxiety, the sixth stage. She delves into the unique challenges of experiencing anxiety in the context of grief and loss, offering insights, coping strategies, and therapeutic approaches to help individuals navigate this complex emotional terrain. 

Difference Between Anxiety and Grief Anxiety

First, it is helpful to know what anxiety is to differentiate it from grief anxiety. Bidwell Smith defines anxiety as “fear of something real or imagined,” underlining its foundation that anxiety comes from fear-based thoughts about things that are not necessarily occurring in the present moment or that may never occur in the future.

People with anxiety typically experience one or more of the following symptoms: sensations of worry or fear, sensations of tension or nervousness, restlessness or irritability, hypervigilance, and panic attacks.

When outlining grief anxiety, Smith identifies unique characteristics that encompass not only the aforementioned anxiety symptoms but also hypochondria, grief attacks, uncontrollable crying, anxiety about death, obsessive thoughts about the deceased, fear of death, obsessive worry about the well-being of loved ones, anxious attachments in relationships, and avoidance of death-related topics.

What The 5 Stages of Grief Misses

Grief anxiety often remains unacknowledged within the grieving process, catching many individuals unaware of its presence. Bidwell Smith explains that the traditional five stages of grief were developed in 1969 by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross to describe what those with a terminal illness and facing their own death were experiencing. Therefore, the 5 stages of grief weren’t originally intended for those dealing with the loss of a loved one and don’t naturally align with the emotions that a person undergoes after such a loss.

This led Bidwell Smith to re-evaluate the 5 stages of grief and add in a 6th stage, grief anxiety. She emphasizes that the existential vulnerability sparked by loss often leads to heightened levels of anxiety surrounding grief and loss. Smith explains, “Death makes us anxious. We experience anxiety after a loss because losing someone we love thrusts us into a vulnerable place. Loss changes our day-to-day lives. It forces us to confront our mortality. And facing these fundamental human truths about life’s unpredictability can cause fear and anxiety to surface in profound and unexpected ways.”

Bidwell Smith’s groundbreaking work sheds light on the obscured realm of grief anxiety, offering solace and guidance to those navigating the complexities of loss. Through understanding and acknowledgment, you can begin the process of healing and self-discovery, trusting you’re not alone in your grief.

Looking For Support Through All Stages of Grief?

To effectively navigate the overwhelming impact of grief anxiety, seeking guidance through grief counseling becomes imperative. Despite its tendency to be overlooked, it’s essential to recognize that you’re not alone in grappling with this challenging aspect of grief. 

Grief Counseling provides a supportive and understanding environment where you can freely explore and process your feelings and thoughts related to loss. At Counseling and Wellness Center of Pittsburgh, Grief Counselors offer invaluable insights and empathetic support, helping you to confront and work through the complexities of grief-related anxiety.

You don’t have to navigate this challenging journey alone. Contact us at 412-856-WELL or fill out the form below to get scheduled  with a compassionate Grief Counselor who can provide the support and guidance you need.

Written by Kelsey Counihan, LCSW, specializing in Grief Counseling.